And another one of my infamous recaps. Two on one day. Fun. On with the show
Gib den Inhalt deines Cuts hier ein.We start with a girl cheating on her girlfriend. The girl friend of cheating girl is searchign for her. And well does not find her.
Opneing credits (Did I ever mention I hate Betty´s credit´s since season 2?)
Tim and Jenny talk blah blah blah. Jenny looks like a hooker claiming she is going to the PLANET. Which she probably does to force Marina to do the work.
Oh how cute. HOW CUUUTE!!! Dana and Lara and Mr. Piddles (Is this cat even in bed when she is there doing the work with her girlfriend?!!?!?) Dana is ashamed of soemthing.
Tima eats some fish for breakfast. Why not? Bette leaves disgusted. for work. I am disgusted too.
We are at the PLANET and Marina and Jenny get it on on the toilet Tim is like huhmmm uh huh.
Alice and Bette try out the bulk pregnancy test box back at the ranch. Oy, I can only agree with them. Honest pictures on the boxes of the pregnancy test!!!
The toilet at the planet must be a very erotic place.....not. Not if Jenny is there. Tim enters the unisextoilet (Is the creator a Ally McBeal fan by any chance?). Scares off Jenny and makes Marina laugh. I am puking right now.
Alice runs excited into the room (did I mention I think she is damn cute?), the test was psitive and suddenly the fish and the other stuff that Tina eats makes sense. Kit is there too suddenly. How did she get there? Don´t have Bete an Tina have a house alert?
Meanwhile Tina tries to force Alice not to tell anyone anything. Good luck THAT will never work. Alice leaves and Kit stays. You go girl! Kit for president! She receives a letter from her estranegd son. That sucker did not call or write to her in 5 yars. No wonder she is alcolic.
Jenny meanwhile talks to her old college professor who she gave a blowjob. The poor professor.
Bette is stressed when Tian calls her to make her promise to come home for dinner. We all know why. Bette is really stressed out. I am feeling sorry for her. I hate freakling by the way, he is so damn ignorant.
Alice is at the PLANET with Dana and Shane and Dana is really really ashamed of soemthing and refuses to ever have sex again. Dana is so cute as they try to get out of her what is wrong. Oh oh oy!!!! She female ejaculated!! Lara=Sex goddess!!!
Is that Giovanni Ribisi? No it is a lesbian idnetified man called Lisa. That confuses Dana´s little tennisplayermind. Still I think this is Giovanni Ribisi in disguise. Anyway Alice flirts with "Lisa" aka Giovanni Ribisi before she leaves to save her mother from something.
And that something is called paying bills. She stayed for 5 days in a luxury hotel 900 Dollars each night. And used the room service. And used thephone. And used the roomserviceboy. Which was 199$ extra. Alice is shocked even though I am not sure about what she actually is shocked. Alice drives with her mother home. Poor Alice. I woudl have already jumped out of the window with that mother.
Bleh next thing is a hetero sex scene. Bleh, unmportant. Oh look it´s Marina. God, I am happy that the sun is right now on my computermonitor. God bless I don´t actually have to see this. But I have to hear Tim´s grunt´s. Disgusting.
Alpha Stressed Bette arrived home. And is not pleased about the third plate. She does not see the pregnancy test on it. At first then she is all awww we are having a baby! Uhm okay. First shout then kiss and make up. I do that all the time too. I like Tina´s hair by the way.
Next day THE PLANET. Everybody is there save Jenny (God bless). Dana is now sad that Lara isn´t there. Muhahahaha Dana ran out of her own apartment and elft Lara alone there muhahahahaha. Alice could not shut up about the baby of Tina and Bette and bette is pissed at Tina for this.
Aaawww now coems the cutest scene till yet. Lara comes with a rose. (I woudl hit ehr with that but that´s because I am allergical to them. But whatever) And they hug and kiss. And now I ant them in the bedroom.
Tim is at the place where wet girl´s grow. And I hate him for sending away a girl who wants to get wet.
Tina and Bette are at the doctor and make a pic of their peanut. Cute peanut by the way. I love peanuts. I am not allergical to them.
Poor Alice is driving her mother to a casting. She follows her and finds out it is not the big movie she pretends to star in it is some little horror movie from a 22 year old student. By the way I love Alice´s MINI ONE. Not to confuse with the Mini Cooper. A MINI ONE is a small BMW with a bit of the original Mini Cooper thrown into the design. So the reason why I would never drive a MINI ONE. I love my Mitsubishi Cooper. It just got legal.
Sorry for the randomness I was a bit distracted as there is nto much to say about that scene.
Eeeeww nude male ass eeeww. God damn it Tim get a shirt!!! I don´t care if Trish is topless (Which I would love by the way wet+topless+girl=happy me). Tim tells Randy Dean about the blowjob professor. Tim Dim is jealouse obviously. ME not I am not even interested in what happens to Jenny. Oh hang on I am interested if someone drives over her with it´s Maybach.
Bette is at the CAC and hs an unscheduled meeeting. She seems to be afraid.
Jenny is meeting her professor. Enough said. They talk about Zahra Zustra and stuff I don´t give a fuck about.
(Did Nick Barkarosch just say Dick Dick Bra?)
Oh Peggy Peabody to the rescue! She saves Bette from gettign fired and give PROVOCATIONS to the CAC. But before that she almost castrates poor James. You gotta love that loyal soul.
Jenny and Nick still talk about crap and Tim is back home because he is jealouse. And he runs throuh most of LA. And lands in Nick Brakarovws bed. I mean his hotel room. Jenny is guess where yes right THE PLANET. And in Marina´s office with Marina´s head between her legs. Alice looks jealosue because of this and crashes their private party as Tim enters THE PLANET. Why did Alice help Jenyn anyway?
Oh pool party^^ loads of wet girls!! Me happy and in heaven. But why is Shane not wet and in the pool? This must be a fest for her after all. But she has kinda the hots for Alice´s mother Leonore. I think she is not hot at all but Shane must be kinda stoned and cured next season. She has a thing for older girls this season. Or freshborn girls. See Lacey.
God not one of Jenny´s halluzination´s again. Why? Why? Why? Abraxas? Oh the connection fo the arty pre-credits-scenes. Nice. Not.
Back to the wet girls. I am too squeeing to write something intelligent. Too many wet girls.
I get suddenly back into reality as Tim enters the screen. And ends the episode.
End of episode
This one was kinda random and boring. Well expect for the wet girls all over the episode. Can we have more of them and less Jenny and Tim?
Have fun I am done
Anne
Samstag, 23. Februar 2008
Season 1 Episode 3 Longing
Sorry for not updating so long. PErsonal issues. Anyway let´s with another recap of mine.
Gib den Inhalt deines Cuts hier ein.We start in soem photographer´s studio with a nude woman. Okay I am all for nude naked girl. But not this one....she is kinda creepy. Next thing we see is they make out and the photographer, who kept shouting at her "I told you not to move!" goe sdown at her.
Opening credits (God how I wish Betty to hell and the old quality cedits back!)
We see Alice and Gabby (She didn´t did she?) in bed and Gabby is mad ebcause she blames Alcie for snoozing the alarm. Which actually Gabby did. Gabby does not have to amke sense. Go away bitch!!!
Eeeeeewwwww EEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
Jenny (Did I mentione EEEEEEEEEWWW?!?!) and Tim the ass in bed...eeeeewww......next the oh so logical cut to THE PLANET and oy oy oy oyyyy OOOOHHH Marina....and eeeeeewww eeewww Jenny....Marina speaks italian...or something really close to it an dI am melting and trying not to jump---- oh wait this is a recap of THE L WORD not about----nevermind....Jenny wants to talk bleh lbah...who cares when Marin is on screen?
Oh Alpha Bette, I love Alpha Bette. Alpha Bette wants to have this pornography clouded as art in the CAC as spring exhibition. She looses to that Freak Franklin who booked another exhibitio n which they showed in the last five years....go Bette and please kill him....you woudl be getting along with murder actually in that case. Gabby storms out with a hurt ego and Alice goes back to her chart.
Jenny is still sitting in THE PLANET (for 4 days in a row actually as we all might know Jenny) and still wants to talk to Marina. Marina on the other hand was possibly busy with someone else. Anyway...Jenny says somethign about safety which no one cares about, and we are out.
Alice and Shane are at THE PLANET too. Shane tells a really happy Alice that bia--- I mean Gabby Devil is cheating on her. I have the mental image of Gabby in a red latex dress with a devilish look and horns right now. Not too bad I must admit. Alice is not pleased but let´s Gabby do so.
Oh now the cutest scene I have ever scene. Dana goes to ask out Lara. She ends up getting Lara cut her finger instead. Which si also cute and Lara insists to kiss it to make it better and says yes with out Dana even getting to ask Lara out. Aaawwwww so damn cut. So cute. Did I mention cute?
Oh Alpha Bette!! Hot hot hot. Did I mention hot? She is still trying to get the show which is called PROVOCATIONS. Tina enters and they talk about PROVOCATIONS curator which is Bette going to meet. And off she drives.
Meanwhile back at the ran--- I mean TH PLANET Tim is complaining about his swimteam. Sucker already does it with Trish obviously. And oh Marina...italian american european goddess. She offers a game of pool to Tim. And makes it sound like a fight for Jenny. Okay honestly what does Jenny have? She does not eat. She gets all the girls. And guys if you care. And she is strange.If you know please leave a comment.
Next thing is that Jenny calls and ooohh uuuhh ooohhh check it out: "Jenny, it´s Marina!" Did Jenny even say soemthing? Anyway she is off to the PLANET and first thing she does there sees Tim and Marina together and faints. Attention seeking bitch!!!!
Anyway let´s forget Jenny Shaggedher. Kit is drinking and DJing at the same time. Respect. Bette is not pleased and pissed as she was 15 minutes late for her meeting and the curator was gone. Jenny is mad at Tim back at the ranch and he gets bitchy (Is he gay?!?!?! I think Harrisson is still single....) to Jenny.
Next the the core gang the only gang menbers I accept are at the PLANET trying to reason Alice to leave Gabby. Oh and Shane is suddenly the UNNABOMBER. And Dana got her date (How cute is she in here??) this evening. Bette gives the ebst breakup thing to say "So step off biatch!" YOU GO GIRL!!!! After that Bette´s mood darkens as Gina Ferrer (Is she related to Marina by the way?) tells her on the phone that PROVOCATIONS went to MOCA. Alice saves the day and tells her that the actual owner of the exhibition is in town. She gives her the adress of her hotel and off Bette is.
Shane meets her stalker on the street. She is handing out those leafs I want to have a shirt of!! I want one of those leafs!! They blah blah blah blah Shane is like "I don´t do relationships!" (Which I can understand by the way) Lacey is all huggy and stuff and wants to keep Shane as a living dildo. She wants her all the time! You go girl! They end up in bed. God I am so jealouse. I can´t even work.
Bette is in her car on her way to Santa Monica to meet or kidnap, I am not sure yet, Peggy Peabody.
Dana, so cute, is on her way to her first date with Lara. She discusses her clothes choice with Alice on the phone. Clearly Alice is already jealouse of Lara. Lara, cute too by the way, wears a dress instead of jeans and thinks she is a geek. And Dana says it right tells her she is beautiful. So cute!!
Bette arrived at the hotel to complete her mission. She can not guess the code word to meet her. Just in time Peggy Peabody arrives with her dogs. Funny woman. I want her as a regular in season 5. Peggy is about to get Bette drunk. I think she got the hots for Bette. Who can blaim her at all? They talk and talk talk and talk till Peggy realizes who Bette is. First she seems to be mad, which could be somekind of strange foreplay after all, and then she is like "Your the lesbian museum director?" Also we learn the term has-bian. They get to know each other. Bette gets to order food.
Gabby visits Alice with flowers. Lame, as flowers always scream "I cheated on you but refuse to leave you!" Gabby is liek blah blah blah I am not gonna se her anymore blah blah blah we are on the same wave intelectual. And Alice gives the best speech ever. Gabby is an emotional cripple I agree. And yes step off biatch!!!
Tina visits Jenny in the asylum. I mean shed....garage...what IS it anyway?!?!?! They talk about Jenny and Marina Jenny is like "No no no I am not having an affair with her blah blah blah!" and Tina leaves Jenny alone as she seemed to be annoyed with her. Jenny stormy off to Marina to possibly get laid. Which says a lot about Tim´s qualities in bed I might mention.
Obviously Bette and Peggy ate something with fish. And talk about art. Obviously the photographer from the beginning. I love the way Peggy says pussy....ahem...on with the show. Peggy shows her the lifesize picture of the creepy woman from the beginning and Bette starts to cry. This is so obvious the Stendahl-syndrom.
Shane is finished with LAcey. And as LAcey wanted it to have it lasted all the long. God Shane must have a really big libido!! Did she steal the mojo of Austin Powers? Shane leaves. Good for her. Good for us as we will possibly never see Lacey again. God, I hope so. Or let Lacey stalk Jenny, she deserves her.
We see Jenny walking the streets of West Hollywood really menaingful. Meaningful means she just walks lookign strange, as always. She arrives at THE PLANET. And talks about feeling "dismanteld" (Is that a new word for nakedness?) and they proceed to have sex. Means Marina does all the work on her knees. Poor Marina. Poor us for having Jenny so close to the screen.Obviously Marina does her job really good as we can read on Jenny´s face.
End of Episode.
I really enjoyed recapping this one. Especially because of LAra and Dana and Alice an Gabby. Bette as pretty good to. The rest was bleh meh okay who cares?
Till the next recap bye bye yours truly
Anne
Opening credits (God how I wish Betty to hell and the old quality cedits back!)
We see Alice and Gabby (She didn´t did she?) in bed and Gabby is mad ebcause she blames Alcie for snoozing the alarm. Which actually Gabby did. Gabby does not have to amke sense. Go away bitch!!!
Eeeeeewwwww EEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
Jenny (Did I mentione EEEEEEEEEWWW?!?!) and Tim the ass in bed...eeeeewww......next the oh so logical cut to THE PLANET and oy oy oy oyyyy OOOOHHH Marina....and eeeeeewww eeewww Jenny....Marina speaks italian...or something really close to it an dI am melting and trying not to jump---- oh wait this is a recap of THE L WORD not about----nevermind....Jenny wants to talk bleh lbah...who cares when Marin is on screen?
Oh Alpha Bette, I love Alpha Bette. Alpha Bette wants to have this pornography clouded as art in the CAC as spring exhibition. She looses to that Freak Franklin who booked another exhibitio n which they showed in the last five years....go Bette and please kill him....you woudl be getting along with murder actually in that case. Gabby storms out with a hurt ego and Alice goes back to her chart.
Jenny is still sitting in THE PLANET (for 4 days in a row actually as we all might know Jenny) and still wants to talk to Marina. Marina on the other hand was possibly busy with someone else. Anyway...Jenny says somethign about safety which no one cares about, and we are out.
Alice and Shane are at THE PLANET too. Shane tells a really happy Alice that bia--- I mean Gabby Devil is cheating on her. I have the mental image of Gabby in a red latex dress with a devilish look and horns right now. Not too bad I must admit. Alice is not pleased but let´s Gabby do so.
Oh now the cutest scene I have ever scene. Dana goes to ask out Lara. She ends up getting Lara cut her finger instead. Which si also cute and Lara insists to kiss it to make it better and says yes with out Dana even getting to ask Lara out. Aaawwwww so damn cut. So cute. Did I mention cute?
Oh Alpha Bette!! Hot hot hot. Did I mention hot? She is still trying to get the show which is called PROVOCATIONS. Tina enters and they talk about PROVOCATIONS curator which is Bette going to meet. And off she drives.
Meanwhile back at the ran--- I mean TH PLANET Tim is complaining about his swimteam. Sucker already does it with Trish obviously. And oh Marina...italian american european goddess. She offers a game of pool to Tim. And makes it sound like a fight for Jenny. Okay honestly what does Jenny have? She does not eat. She gets all the girls. And guys if you care. And she is strange.If you know please leave a comment.
Next thing is that Jenny calls and ooohh uuuhh ooohhh check it out: "Jenny, it´s Marina!" Did Jenny even say soemthing? Anyway she is off to the PLANET and first thing she does there sees Tim and Marina together and faints. Attention seeking bitch!!!!
Anyway let´s forget Jenny Shaggedher. Kit is drinking and DJing at the same time. Respect. Bette is not pleased and pissed as she was 15 minutes late for her meeting and the curator was gone. Jenny is mad at Tim back at the ranch and he gets bitchy (Is he gay?!?!?! I think Harrisson is still single....) to Jenny.
Next the the core gang the only gang menbers I accept are at the PLANET trying to reason Alice to leave Gabby. Oh and Shane is suddenly the UNNABOMBER. And Dana got her date (How cute is she in here??) this evening. Bette gives the ebst breakup thing to say "So step off biatch!" YOU GO GIRL!!!! After that Bette´s mood darkens as Gina Ferrer (Is she related to Marina by the way?) tells her on the phone that PROVOCATIONS went to MOCA. Alice saves the day and tells her that the actual owner of the exhibition is in town. She gives her the adress of her hotel and off Bette is.
Shane meets her stalker on the street. She is handing out those leafs I want to have a shirt of!! I want one of those leafs!! They blah blah blah blah Shane is like "I don´t do relationships!" (Which I can understand by the way) Lacey is all huggy and stuff and wants to keep Shane as a living dildo. She wants her all the time! You go girl! They end up in bed. God I am so jealouse. I can´t even work.
Bette is in her car on her way to Santa Monica to meet or kidnap, I am not sure yet, Peggy Peabody.
Dana, so cute, is on her way to her first date with Lara. She discusses her clothes choice with Alice on the phone. Clearly Alice is already jealouse of Lara. Lara, cute too by the way, wears a dress instead of jeans and thinks she is a geek. And Dana says it right tells her she is beautiful. So cute!!
Bette arrived at the hotel to complete her mission. She can not guess the code word to meet her. Just in time Peggy Peabody arrives with her dogs. Funny woman. I want her as a regular in season 5. Peggy is about to get Bette drunk. I think she got the hots for Bette. Who can blaim her at all? They talk and talk talk and talk till Peggy realizes who Bette is. First she seems to be mad, which could be somekind of strange foreplay after all, and then she is like "Your the lesbian museum director?" Also we learn the term has-bian. They get to know each other. Bette gets to order food.
Gabby visits Alice with flowers. Lame, as flowers always scream "I cheated on you but refuse to leave you!" Gabby is liek blah blah blah I am not gonna se her anymore blah blah blah we are on the same wave intelectual. And Alice gives the best speech ever. Gabby is an emotional cripple I agree. And yes step off biatch!!!
Tina visits Jenny in the asylum. I mean shed....garage...what IS it anyway?!?!?! They talk about Jenny and Marina Jenny is like "No no no I am not having an affair with her blah blah blah!" and Tina leaves Jenny alone as she seemed to be annoyed with her. Jenny stormy off to Marina to possibly get laid. Which says a lot about Tim´s qualities in bed I might mention.
Obviously Bette and Peggy ate something with fish. And talk about art. Obviously the photographer from the beginning. I love the way Peggy says pussy....ahem...on with the show. Peggy shows her the lifesize picture of the creepy woman from the beginning and Bette starts to cry. This is so obvious the Stendahl-syndrom.
Shane is finished with LAcey. And as LAcey wanted it to have it lasted all the long. God Shane must have a really big libido!! Did she steal the mojo of Austin Powers? Shane leaves. Good for her. Good for us as we will possibly never see Lacey again. God, I hope so. Or let Lacey stalk Jenny, she deserves her.
We see Jenny walking the streets of West Hollywood really menaingful. Meaningful means she just walks lookign strange, as always. She arrives at THE PLANET. And talks about feeling "dismanteld" (Is that a new word for nakedness?) and they proceed to have sex. Means Marina does all the work on her knees. Poor Marina. Poor us for having Jenny so close to the screen.Obviously Marina does her job really good as we can read on Jenny´s face.
End of Episode.
I really enjoyed recapping this one. Especially because of LAra and Dana and Alice an Gabby. Bette as pretty good to. The rest was bleh meh okay who cares?
Till the next recap bye bye yours truly
Anne
Season 1 Episode 2 Let´s do it
We start with Alice and her creepy boss at LA Magazine. The guy does not like Alice superb idea of THE CHART and forces her to write somethign about vagina rejuvination or something like that.
WE GOT CREDITS!!!! And I love them. God bless it is not heterosexual Tim again. I can not stand this guy. Tina jogs through West Hollywood sweating and suddenly decides that Magic Johnson wannabe is the perfect donor. Bette is pleased and they get into the shower. Okay why canwe actually see whatthey are doing inside the damn shower??!?!
Instead of that we see the heterosexual couple Tim dioes not listen to Jenny. He should have. I bet Jenny wanted to tell him about Marina or something like: "Hey Tim letdrive to Las Vegas get married and then Ikick you off the STARDUST and get rich from your life insurance and run away with Marina to Tijuhana!" Instead she say the following: "Goteam!" Jenny was obviously never a cheerleader in High School.
We switch to Shane and Lisa, better known as Fuck Buddy from 1 am till 8am. Shane leaves Lisa and we see at Lisanipplethat it must be very cold in LA. And oh yes Shane obviously is still horny and calls another girl, better known as Fuck Buddy from 9 am till 4pm, as lisa is pretty beat. And oh yes did I forget to mention that Lacey is nwo offcially Shanestalker? No? Well, now you know it.
I just love her. Alice meets her nasty devilish Ex Gabby DeVaux at the vagina wig dog. They hook up immiadtly. Poor alice. Go there are some hot chicks at the doctoroffice.
YAY!!! The introductuon of the "soup" chef. Go Lara. I just love her. I love those vegetables but Irather eat Lara....I betetr stp now before I get too graphical.
Jenny listens to a vociemail from Marina and tries to write aka halluzinate. Whatever.
Lacey annyos and photographs Shane at the same time. Marina looks at jenny and Jenny ignores her. Dana has gaydar problems. Alice and Shane help her. A customer? For what? For Domina studios? Whoa Dana literally freaks out when Alice tells them she put the chart on the internet. you go girl!!! Alice is the ebst....with Dana!!
Jenny has taken drugs and still halluzinates about Sarah Schuster. whatever.
Now this is the best scene till now. The insemination and worshipping of "maigcal juice" aka sperm. I bet Shanewould have been better. Whatever.
The trio searches for Lara on the chart but they canfind her. The girls almost beat up Alice for even considering dating Gabby again. They can not find a solution for Dana yet and what do they do? Right, visit the insaminating couple after they have finished. Dana gets a bit of the "magic juice" on her and is really disgusted but really cute. I lvoe the way alice uses the chance to feel her up through her shirt. The deploy a mission to find out if she is gay or straight. You know like Mission Impossible right? Only gay.
Dana gets a visit from her creepy stupid asshole agent in the locker rooms. I hate unisex locker rooms. And I hate Conrad Asshole. Anway he tells Subaru is interested in her and will watch her train tommorow. And then he leaves. And Lara enters. And Dana freaks, because Lara starts to undresss. Yes, I first thoguht that too butno she just changes her clothes because she must look presentable in the kitchen. Lucky vegetables.
Obviously Gabby stood Alice up. Alice be thankful for this. She is no good for you. They leave The Planet for Danacountry club.
Okay, I can not resist this:
How many lesbians fit into a MINI ONE? 4 obviously.
And the deployed mission to find out if Lara is staright or gay starts. I honestly would not have thought for a second that they are tryign to find this out. What about you? They look so convincing as secret agents. Honestly. So the test fails and they sent out Shane, even she fails to find out anything about her. Figs? Why didnjust asked: "Want to fuck here or in the kitchen?"
Tim goes to The Planet to byu coffee and invites Marina to a dinner party. Boring boring boring. Jenny shows marina engament ring and Bette find sotu Jenny is cheating on tim with Marina. Oh yes she argues with Kit this episode who si siting in the dark house of Bette and Tine. Why does she have keys? Why does she sit there in the dark. Anyway, Kit is in the 12-step-AA-program and wants to apologize for everythign bad ahe did to bette in Bettelife.
And the best scene of this episode!! The infamous country club locker rooms. Lara walks into a wet Dana. Not tTHAT way!!! she just out of the shower. Dana I mean. Dana tells her Subaru took her as tennis playing babe. Lara leaves, Dana sighs, Lara comes back and kisses Dana twice. That was the cutest kiss on TV. Lara happy, Dana happy, me happy. Only Kit and Bette are unhappy.
Alice and Shane are in The Planet and obviously Alice invited Gabby. Shane is not pleased as she hates Gabby. I go with Shane in this case. Alice and Gabby meet the wall. Lacey sinsg a song for shane and Shane looses her Fuck Buddy from 11 pm till 8am because of Laceyguitar play.
That was the whole episode?
WE GOT CREDITS!!!! And I love them. God bless it is not heterosexual Tim again. I can not stand this guy. Tina jogs through West Hollywood sweating and suddenly decides that Magic Johnson wannabe is the perfect donor. Bette is pleased and they get into the shower. Okay why canwe actually see whatthey are doing inside the damn shower??!?!
Instead of that we see the heterosexual couple Tim dioes not listen to Jenny. He should have. I bet Jenny wanted to tell him about Marina or something like: "Hey Tim letdrive to Las Vegas get married and then Ikick you off the STARDUST and get rich from your life insurance and run away with Marina to Tijuhana!" Instead she say the following: "Goteam!" Jenny was obviously never a cheerleader in High School.
We switch to Shane and Lisa, better known as Fuck Buddy from 1 am till 8am. Shane leaves Lisa and we see at Lisanipplethat it must be very cold in LA. And oh yes Shane obviously is still horny and calls another girl, better known as Fuck Buddy from 9 am till 4pm, as lisa is pretty beat. And oh yes did I forget to mention that Lacey is nwo offcially Shanestalker? No? Well, now you know it.
I just love her. Alice meets her nasty devilish Ex Gabby DeVaux at the vagina wig dog. They hook up immiadtly. Poor alice. Go there are some hot chicks at the doctoroffice.
YAY!!! The introductuon of the "soup" chef. Go Lara. I just love her. I love those vegetables but Irather eat Lara....I betetr stp now before I get too graphical.
Jenny listens to a vociemail from Marina and tries to write aka halluzinate. Whatever.
Lacey annyos and photographs Shane at the same time. Marina looks at jenny and Jenny ignores her. Dana has gaydar problems. Alice and Shane help her. A customer? For what? For Domina studios? Whoa Dana literally freaks out when Alice tells them she put the chart on the internet. you go girl!!! Alice is the ebst....with Dana!!
Jenny has taken drugs and still halluzinates about Sarah Schuster. whatever.
Now this is the best scene till now. The insemination and worshipping of "maigcal juice" aka sperm. I bet Shanewould have been better. Whatever.
The trio searches for Lara on the chart but they canfind her. The girls almost beat up Alice for even considering dating Gabby again. They can not find a solution for Dana yet and what do they do? Right, visit the insaminating couple after they have finished. Dana gets a bit of the "magic juice" on her and is really disgusted but really cute. I lvoe the way alice uses the chance to feel her up through her shirt. The deploy a mission to find out if she is gay or straight. You know like Mission Impossible right? Only gay.
Dana gets a visit from her creepy stupid asshole agent in the locker rooms. I hate unisex locker rooms. And I hate Conrad Asshole. Anway he tells Subaru is interested in her and will watch her train tommorow. And then he leaves. And Lara enters. And Dana freaks, because Lara starts to undresss. Yes, I first thoguht that too butno she just changes her clothes because she must look presentable in the kitchen. Lucky vegetables.
Obviously Gabby stood Alice up. Alice be thankful for this. She is no good for you. They leave The Planet for Danacountry club.
Okay, I can not resist this:
How many lesbians fit into a MINI ONE? 4 obviously.
And the deployed mission to find out if Lara is staright or gay starts. I honestly would not have thought for a second that they are tryign to find this out. What about you? They look so convincing as secret agents. Honestly. So the test fails and they sent out Shane, even she fails to find out anything about her. Figs? Why didnjust asked: "Want to fuck here or in the kitchen?"
Tim goes to The Planet to byu coffee and invites Marina to a dinner party. Boring boring boring. Jenny shows marina engament ring and Bette find sotu Jenny is cheating on tim with Marina. Oh yes she argues with Kit this episode who si siting in the dark house of Bette and Tine. Why does she have keys? Why does she sit there in the dark. Anyway, Kit is in the 12-step-AA-program and wants to apologize for everythign bad ahe did to bette in Bettelife.
And the best scene of this episode!! The infamous country club locker rooms. Lara walks into a wet Dana. Not tTHAT way!!! she just out of the shower. Dana I mean. Dana tells her Subaru took her as tennis playing babe. Lara leaves, Dana sighs, Lara comes back and kisses Dana twice. That was the cutest kiss on TV. Lara happy, Dana happy, me happy. Only Kit and Bette are unhappy.
Alice and Shane are in The Planet and obviously Alice invited Gabby. Shane is not pleased as she hates Gabby. I go with Shane in this case. Alice and Gabby meet the wall. Lacey sinsg a song for shane and Shane looses her Fuck Buddy from 11 pm till 8am because of Laceyguitar play.
That was the whole episode?
Season 1 Pilot
Recap Season 1 Pilot
So this is it. The beginnign of everything The L Word. And which person we see first in a lesbian TV series? Yes, of course. A heterosexual man. Called Tim, out of all names. It makes so much sense to show a heterosexual man as the first person in a lesbian series. Anyway, on with the show. Next thing we see is the lesbian couple, Bette and Tina. and what does Bette say to Tina when she calls her in to look at what looks like a pregnancy test? Of course does Bette say "Youovulating!". Yep, makes so muchsense to say that at a pregnancy test. Fianlly we see some shower action, at least we think so. But no the camera shows us the heterosexual man again...
We move the scene to the local lesbian Cafe called "The Planet". And honestly I liek what is standign at the counter there. Perhaps I go there someday. Sems liek everyone knows everone there. In what little we live, always a little wonder to me. Oh and the DANISH shipping starts rigth there when Bette and Tina kiss....I am just saying....just look into ym photobucket at the screencaps of this episode. I mean look at teh way they argue. Itcalled a very long lasting foreplay. And oh yes Bette and Tina go to a psycharist but no oen is supposed to know this in the lesbian world in LA (dream on on keepign a secret a secret in LA).
We leave THE PLANET and see our favourite charatcer....NOT....here comes Jenyn to mess up the lebian world of LA. And oh looks liek she starts with the heerosexual Tim guy. She picks her up from the airport. Tim, why couldnyou have just left her there for our own sake?
So, we leave Tim and Jenny and enter Dan Foxworthyoffice. A guy as psychatrist for a lesbian couple. Nice nice nice. I smell trouble. And oh yes here comes trouble in the form of Bette and her cell phone. She really loves it here obviously. Just look at the way she she sits there and always has her cell phone in her hands. And we get to know that she is the director of the California Arts center.
And we are back with the look of sanity Jenny and the heterosexual Tim guy. Tim shows her the city in a muscle car. Who needs a heterosexula couple in a lesbian TV series? We just leave them alone....
Back at the Foxworthy office Bette and Dan are arguing about if Foxworthy even knows anything about lesbian sex at all. Good point Bette, you might want to write that down for later. They end the session with no solution at all.
Again muscle car Tim and insane jenny drive around in the muscle car. Can´t we just dump them in Siberia already? Jenny is pleased and surprised with her new writing studio.
Oh now begins the fun part lesbians in search for a sperm donor. Only they donknow yet that they need one. Bette and Tina babble while Sean,. the first donorname wanks into a cup (I would not touch that!!!). They drive to theactual isnemination and Tian has it between her legs, eeeww....disgusting, Bette is on the phone and telsl soemthing about "....used to swallow that stuff..." to one of her work mates. Okay, I liked my work mates too but I woudl never ever tell them in my whole life would tell them what I used to swallow!!!
WHOA!!! Jenny you go girl. Watching a little not youthfree peepshow followed by fuckfest in Bette and tinapool. I just hope they cleaned the pool.
Oh we are at a doctors office. It is the insemination and the doc just told our couple that they should fuck each other to get a higher chance of getting a baby. Bette just thinks the same thing as me. That it is a stupid idea. And oh by the way Seanjust fresh wanked sperm is dead. So they go on search for a new donor.
Jenny looks for a job. Whatever...she can stay there and live there.
The gang meets at THE PLANET and we get to know Alice had it with Sean. and that she is bisexual. And that Dana is jealouse. And yes there is always Shane as spermdonor. And yes Dana is not out and freaks otu about Shane that she dresses well...the way she just dresses. Next second is Helloing a girl outside the window. God damn it Dana. Your gaydar really sucks. ItJenny. Save Dana burn Jenny. Anyway, so much for Dana being afraid of outed.
I am not even going to comment Jenny and hetero Timfuckfest at all. It just is disgusting. Oh by the way if your girlriend tells you about the lesbian fuckfest next door while you have sex you are in really big trouble.
Hey, hey, hey. Looks like Hetero Tim got a nice job as swim trainer for UC. I liek those girls. juiocy...wet girls...yummy. Oh yes Tim and another htero guy talk. About whatever. I doncare bring back the wet girls!!!
Meanwhile abck at The Planet they talk about buttwaxing. Alcie did it. No one else did it. I am not even surprised that she is the only one who buttwaxed. And by the way they are having a party to get sperm donor for Bette and Tina. Problem solved on with the show.
Meanwhile back at the ranch Tina scares Jenny. Probably they planned of getting rid of her already as Tina suddenly steps up out fo nowhere. Too abd it did not work. Tina makes a big mistake and invites the couple to join the sperm donour party. Did they have Tim in mind or what? Jenyn wrote story. Who cares?
And here comes the lovely Kit Porter. Totally drunk obviously as she is in such a good mood. Driving without a driving license. The cop is cool and brings her to her sisters sperm donour party. bette is pissed they can nto fidn a donour, and the party sucks.
Dana totally freaks out as Tim recognizes her. Too fucking funny. I love expression there. And she has the gayest guy on earth as her cover up boyfriend. And oh yeah tim is a lesbian. The infamous ringfiger longer than other finger thing. Harrisson hits on Tim and he does nto know it ...too funny. Harrission proposes to Tim meanwhile.
Dana almost kills Harison after his joke. I admit it the joke was not funny at all. I would have killed him too.
Alice is hitting on Jenny. alcie dondo it you will only regret it. Oh god bless there comes Marina to the rescue. You go girl. I bet she thinks that the thing with Jenny was a terrible mistake in the end and thatwhy she wanted to commit suicide. I would have done that too. All the insanit of Jenny is too much to handle for one person.
The end of the party is thebirth of Yoda. Thannks Alice for that, you go girl.
I am going to pretend Jenny and Tim do not exist from this point on they just annoy me.
Seems like Dana as a professional Tennis player can not afford a eprsonal trainer and must trian with the commons. Better known as Tina Kennard. They talk about relationships. as if one would work in this series at all. By the way nice view into Tinatop.
Oh my fucking god!! Everyboidy run away from The planet and hide. Jenny just entered the room. God, poor people. jenny talks about strange things. The gang is emberassed and pretends she just exacaped and did not take her pills. Marina invites Jenny to her reading group.
Oh yes, Jean-Luc or Jeanvanier. "Ze Penizz, ze puzzy, ze baby!" My favourite Scene!!!! You go girl!! The look on his face is hilarious when they tell him he can not fuck them.
The gang meets cne again at the planet and Tina is pissed, to say it nice. Tina and Bette argue. And they leave mad at each other. Leaving the other 3 girls behind.
Hetero couple meets hetero couple. Boring unecessary. I pretend I did not see it at all.
Jenny at RADAR. She so makes sense there. Inbetween all those ncie looking girls. Yummy girls I might add. And why is Dana suddenly not worried abotu getting outed anymore? And we get to know what Nippel confidence is. What a nice thing. Jenny leaves the party god bless.
Jenny works at Laurel farms. and checks out Marina. I think she should go back to work. Or be locked away. Poor Marina. MArina invites Jenny to a reading group. Whatever
Hetero couples...not any word from me about them.
Tina gets hit on by her gym trainer from earlier. She resists. Good girl. I would have probably not but this show is not about meafterall right?
Marina brings Jenny home. nice...and why we are seeign this? I have no clue.
Tina climbs into her and Bettebed. Cute how she takes care of Bette. I want that too. Next thing in the morning is that they go back to Foxworthy.
Marina and Jenny meet in a bathroom in a restaurant. Alice seems to notice this. She seems to like bathrooms. Important for later seasons.
Tim and Jenny argue because Jenny wonlet him read her story. Bleh, whatever. Tiny Tim does not get hiswill and runs out pouting. Tehy talk about their so functional relaionship. Yeah right as if. And the tower in Pisa is straight. Tim decides ittime to get married.
Bette and Tina are back at Foxworthyagain. Bette is late but has a godoe cuse. She found a donor. Tina says relucantly yes. For now. Tina is shocked the enxt morning because Marcus allenwood, the donor, is a Magic Johnson wannabe. Means he isa black giant. Tina goes "Fuck!".
Bette arrives later that evening at The planet and Tina lashes out on her because shethinsk she ainready to get a black baby. Bette is right and is hurt by thopse words and starts to cry.
Meanwhile back at the Haspel Ranch Tim goes and reads Jennycrappy story and decides once again to get married and goes off to buy engagement rings. At 3 am in the night.
Bette is mad at Tina because she is ovulating and does not inseminate. Bette goes of to Kit pouting. Bette talks with her and Kit reasons her a bit. You go girl!
Dana and Alice go to milI just love that scene because they have their personal arguing foreplay again.
Bette is having something with an art group, they find a donor there and take him home to fuck him. But he does not want to be sued as sperm donor. He wants to have safer sex. Too bad for Bette.
Marina and Jenny ahve a date. Whatever it si boring and ends with a fuck fest and Jenyn crying.
Meanwhile at MILK Dana, Alice and shane check oout fresh meat aka CHRISPAY. I just love that scene. And yes, Alice and Dana promise each other not to fuck each other. Yeah, try harder. They start THE CHART. I lvoe them together did I mention that?
Well that was the very beginning of The L Word ad it was great I hope you ahve all enjoyed this recap. Typhos are included so bare me I am only german.
So this is it. The beginnign of everything The L Word. And which person we see first in a lesbian TV series? Yes, of course. A heterosexual man. Called Tim, out of all names. It makes so much sense to show a heterosexual man as the first person in a lesbian series. Anyway, on with the show. Next thing we see is the lesbian couple, Bette and Tina. and what does Bette say to Tina when she calls her in to look at what looks like a pregnancy test? Of course does Bette say "Youovulating!". Yep, makes so muchsense to say that at a pregnancy test. Fianlly we see some shower action, at least we think so. But no the camera shows us the heterosexual man again...
We move the scene to the local lesbian Cafe called "The Planet". And honestly I liek what is standign at the counter there. Perhaps I go there someday. Sems liek everyone knows everone there. In what little we live, always a little wonder to me. Oh and the DANISH shipping starts rigth there when Bette and Tina kiss....I am just saying....just look into ym photobucket at the screencaps of this episode. I mean look at teh way they argue. Itcalled a very long lasting foreplay. And oh yes Bette and Tina go to a psycharist but no oen is supposed to know this in the lesbian world in LA (dream on on keepign a secret a secret in LA).
We leave THE PLANET and see our favourite charatcer....NOT....here comes Jenyn to mess up the lebian world of LA. And oh looks liek she starts with the heerosexual Tim guy. She picks her up from the airport. Tim, why couldnyou have just left her there for our own sake?
So, we leave Tim and Jenny and enter Dan Foxworthyoffice. A guy as psychatrist for a lesbian couple. Nice nice nice. I smell trouble. And oh yes here comes trouble in the form of Bette and her cell phone. She really loves it here obviously. Just look at the way she she sits there and always has her cell phone in her hands. And we get to know that she is the director of the California Arts center.
And we are back with the look of sanity Jenny and the heterosexual Tim guy. Tim shows her the city in a muscle car. Who needs a heterosexula couple in a lesbian TV series? We just leave them alone....
Back at the Foxworthy office Bette and Dan are arguing about if Foxworthy even knows anything about lesbian sex at all. Good point Bette, you might want to write that down for later. They end the session with no solution at all.
Again muscle car Tim and insane jenny drive around in the muscle car. Can´t we just dump them in Siberia already? Jenny is pleased and surprised with her new writing studio.
Oh now begins the fun part lesbians in search for a sperm donor. Only they donknow yet that they need one. Bette and Tina babble while Sean,. the first donorname wanks into a cup (I would not touch that!!!). They drive to theactual isnemination and Tian has it between her legs, eeeww....disgusting, Bette is on the phone and telsl soemthing about "....used to swallow that stuff..." to one of her work mates. Okay, I liked my work mates too but I woudl never ever tell them in my whole life would tell them what I used to swallow!!!
WHOA!!! Jenny you go girl. Watching a little not youthfree peepshow followed by fuckfest in Bette and tinapool. I just hope they cleaned the pool.
Oh we are at a doctors office. It is the insemination and the doc just told our couple that they should fuck each other to get a higher chance of getting a baby. Bette just thinks the same thing as me. That it is a stupid idea. And oh by the way Seanjust fresh wanked sperm is dead. So they go on search for a new donor.
Jenny looks for a job. Whatever...she can stay there and live there.
The gang meets at THE PLANET and we get to know Alice had it with Sean. and that she is bisexual. And that Dana is jealouse. And yes there is always Shane as spermdonor. And yes Dana is not out and freaks otu about Shane that she dresses well...the way she just dresses. Next second is Helloing a girl outside the window. God damn it Dana. Your gaydar really sucks. ItJenny. Save Dana burn Jenny. Anyway, so much for Dana being afraid of outed.
I am not even going to comment Jenny and hetero Timfuckfest at all. It just is disgusting. Oh by the way if your girlriend tells you about the lesbian fuckfest next door while you have sex you are in really big trouble.
Hey, hey, hey. Looks like Hetero Tim got a nice job as swim trainer for UC. I liek those girls. juiocy...wet girls...yummy. Oh yes Tim and another htero guy talk. About whatever. I doncare bring back the wet girls!!!
Meanwhile abck at The Planet they talk about buttwaxing. Alcie did it. No one else did it. I am not even surprised that she is the only one who buttwaxed. And by the way they are having a party to get sperm donor for Bette and Tina. Problem solved on with the show.
Meanwhile back at the ranch Tina scares Jenny. Probably they planned of getting rid of her already as Tina suddenly steps up out fo nowhere. Too abd it did not work. Tina makes a big mistake and invites the couple to join the sperm donour party. Did they have Tim in mind or what? Jenyn wrote story. Who cares?
And here comes the lovely Kit Porter. Totally drunk obviously as she is in such a good mood. Driving without a driving license. The cop is cool and brings her to her sisters sperm donour party. bette is pissed they can nto fidn a donour, and the party sucks.
Dana totally freaks out as Tim recognizes her. Too fucking funny. I love expression there. And she has the gayest guy on earth as her cover up boyfriend. And oh yeah tim is a lesbian. The infamous ringfiger longer than other finger thing. Harrisson hits on Tim and he does nto know it ...too funny. Harrission proposes to Tim meanwhile.
Dana almost kills Harison after his joke. I admit it the joke was not funny at all. I would have killed him too.
Alice is hitting on Jenny. alcie dondo it you will only regret it. Oh god bless there comes Marina to the rescue. You go girl. I bet she thinks that the thing with Jenny was a terrible mistake in the end and thatwhy she wanted to commit suicide. I would have done that too. All the insanit of Jenny is too much to handle for one person.
The end of the party is thebirth of Yoda. Thannks Alice for that, you go girl.
I am going to pretend Jenny and Tim do not exist from this point on they just annoy me.
Seems like Dana as a professional Tennis player can not afford a eprsonal trainer and must trian with the commons. Better known as Tina Kennard. They talk about relationships. as if one would work in this series at all. By the way nice view into Tinatop.
Oh my fucking god!! Everyboidy run away from The planet and hide. Jenny just entered the room. God, poor people. jenny talks about strange things. The gang is emberassed and pretends she just exacaped and did not take her pills. Marina invites Jenny to her reading group.
Oh yes, Jean-Luc or Jeanvanier. "Ze Penizz, ze puzzy, ze baby!" My favourite Scene!!!! You go girl!! The look on his face is hilarious when they tell him he can not fuck them.
The gang meets cne again at the planet and Tina is pissed, to say it nice. Tina and Bette argue. And they leave mad at each other. Leaving the other 3 girls behind.
Hetero couple meets hetero couple. Boring unecessary. I pretend I did not see it at all.
Jenny at RADAR. She so makes sense there. Inbetween all those ncie looking girls. Yummy girls I might add. And why is Dana suddenly not worried abotu getting outed anymore? And we get to know what Nippel confidence is. What a nice thing. Jenny leaves the party god bless.
Jenny works at Laurel farms. and checks out Marina. I think she should go back to work. Or be locked away. Poor Marina. MArina invites Jenny to a reading group. Whatever
Hetero couples...not any word from me about them.
Tina gets hit on by her gym trainer from earlier. She resists. Good girl. I would have probably not but this show is not about meafterall right?
Marina brings Jenny home. nice...and why we are seeign this? I have no clue.
Tina climbs into her and Bettebed. Cute how she takes care of Bette. I want that too. Next thing in the morning is that they go back to Foxworthy.
Marina and Jenny meet in a bathroom in a restaurant. Alice seems to notice this. She seems to like bathrooms. Important for later seasons.
Tim and Jenny argue because Jenny wonlet him read her story. Bleh, whatever. Tiny Tim does not get hiswill and runs out pouting. Tehy talk about their so functional relaionship. Yeah right as if. And the tower in Pisa is straight. Tim decides ittime to get married.
Bette and Tina are back at Foxworthyagain. Bette is late but has a godoe cuse. She found a donor. Tina says relucantly yes. For now. Tina is shocked the enxt morning because Marcus allenwood, the donor, is a Magic Johnson wannabe. Means he isa black giant. Tina goes "Fuck!".
Bette arrives later that evening at The planet and Tina lashes out on her because shethinsk she ainready to get a black baby. Bette is right and is hurt by thopse words and starts to cry.
Meanwhile back at the Haspel Ranch Tim goes and reads Jennycrappy story and decides once again to get married and goes off to buy engagement rings. At 3 am in the night.
Bette is mad at Tina because she is ovulating and does not inseminate. Bette goes of to Kit pouting. Bette talks with her and Kit reasons her a bit. You go girl!
Dana and Alice go to milI just love that scene because they have their personal arguing foreplay again.
Bette is having something with an art group, they find a donor there and take him home to fuck him. But he does not want to be sued as sperm donor. He wants to have safer sex. Too bad for Bette.
Marina and Jenny ahve a date. Whatever it si boring and ends with a fuck fest and Jenyn crying.
Meanwhile at MILK Dana, Alice and shane check oout fresh meat aka CHRISPAY. I just love that scene. And yes, Alice and Dana promise each other not to fuck each other. Yeah, try harder. They start THE CHART. I lvoe them together did I mention that?
Well that was the very beginning of The L Word ad it was great I hope you ahve all enjoyed this recap. Typhos are included so bare me I am only german.
Welcome to the our new home!
Hello,
so I know it´s been months but I promise to make more recaps soon. So anyway, THE L WORD RECAPS moved to a new home. Hope you like it here and please comment on my recaps ^^
Till then have fun
Anne Riddle
so I know it´s been months but I promise to make more recaps soon. So anyway, THE L WORD RECAPS moved to a new home. Hope you like it here and please comment on my recaps ^^
Till then have fun
Anne Riddle
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